Hello. My name is Thomas (“Tom”) Lai. I am a Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying), embodiment teacher and learning specialist who helps adults who feel held back by fear, despair, anxiety, shame or self-doubt – and those navigating a crisis of meaning or identity – live more fully in the face of what we can't control.

All through my life, I've pondered the human condition: who am I, what brings us meaning, why we suffer, whether we can free ourselves from the burdens of our past, and how we carry on despite it all. My struggle to find answers sparked a long process of inner work that continues today. What I've learned so far is that healing is possible. And while we may not be able to eradicate all our trauma, we can grow to become bigger than it and face life with dignity, courage, and resilience.

My practice is trauma-informed, culturally sensitive, anti-oppressive & liberatory, and rooted in the principles of existential-humanistic psychotherapy. Don’t worry – I’ll explain what each of those things mean below (coming soon). I am also informed by both Eastern and Western traditions, drawing on a decade of personal practice in mindfulness and meditation.

Having lived in between spaces as a queer, 1.5-generation Chinese-Canadian with Indian ancestry, I understand how challenging it can be to navigate intersecting identities, cultures, and finding a sense of belonging. Sometimes we can feel out of place even in our own communities. I strive to create a safe and welcoming space for people of all cultural backgrounds and offer LGBTQ+ affirming care. You don’t have to look like me to work with me. I will hold space for all parts of you – even the ones others can’t see.

Before becoming a therapist, I worked in adult learning and development, designing learning experiences for students, teams, and internationally trained professionals. I've also coached transitional age youth and graduates navigating life and career transitions. These were all rewarding experiences that taught me how to meet people where they are, with patience, compassion and sensitivity to their unique needs and lived experiences.

Whatever you've gone through, and whatever you might still be carrying, know that you don't have to face the unbearable alone. I will accompany you as you stand at the edge of your experience and together we can discover what wisdom wants to be revealed there.